Red Flags In My Relationship With My Partner
Violence by a partner refers to psychological, physical, sexual, or economic actions committed by one partner against another without their consent. It is aimed at causing physical and/or emotional suffering and harm, and at forcing the other person to comply with their demands through the use of force, coercion, power, or threats.
“Red flags”
Red flags are signals that you should think more carefully before continuing a relationship with a partner.
“No” is not respected
If your disagreement is not understood or accepted in response to a request or demand—even after you repeat it—this is a warning sign. No one can question your right to say no or refuse something.
“I’ve been unlucky in past relationships, but you’re not like that, right?”
Relationship choices are not about fate or luck; they reflect a person’s inner world. The phrase “you’re not like that, right?” can be manipulative. It may push you into behaving in a way that benefits your partner rather than yourself.
“Just don’t fall in love with me”
This is a clear message that should be taken literally. Later, it may be used as: “I warned you,” to justify harmful behavior or dismiss your feelings.
“Why are you doing such stupid things? Do you even need that?”
This may be said in response to your interests, hobbies, or goals. Over time, it can lead to isolation from friends or family, especially those your partner disapproves of. This is often framed as “care,” but it can result in dependency and control.
“You are exactly what I was looking for, no need to wait”
Such statements may indicate impulsive attachment and unrealistic expectations. Healthy relationships usually require time to understand each other properly.
“My relationships are always complicated”
This may indicate that the person has not emotionally or formally ended previous relationships, potentially creating emotional triangles in new relationships.
“I just worry about you, so tell me all the time where you are, what you are doing, and who you are with”
While concern can be genuine, constant monitoring is a sign of control rather than care. It may indicate a tendency toward controlling behavior.
“That’s just how I am”
When someone justifies harmful behavior as part of their personality and refuses to reflect or change, it signals a lack of willingness to improve the relationship.
“There’s nothing wrong with gambling, alcohol, or drug use”
Impulsive or risky behaviors that affect safety or indicate addiction can signal instability and may place you in a caretaking role within the relationship.
If you notice signs of violence in your relationship:
- Ensure your physical safety and recognize the risk. Violence often repeats and escalates.
- Remember: you are not to blame. The responsibility lies with the person who is using violence.
- Violence does not stop on its own.
- Share what is happening with someone you trust.
- Learn about relationship violence to better understand it.
- Seek professional support. In Armenia, there are trained professionals who provide ethical assistance.
- Take care of yourself—even small daily moments of comfort matter.
- Stay connected to supportive people who remind you that violence is not normal.
Support in case of violence:
Police: 112
LGBTQ+ and partner violence hotline (Pink Armenia NGO): 033 522 533
Domestic violence hotline (Women’s Support Center NGO): 099 887 808
Sexual violence crisis center hotline: 077 991 280